I am holding on to something, someone which were not mine in the first place. Nothing in this world is mine, nobody is my property.
I get things and lose things, those final decisions are not in my hand. So why am I so attached?
I was thinking about the past, making the past better, since I feel I’ve gained nothing. I was so much in my head, thinking about my past and future, I dropped all of my rice. It fell on the floor, all of it with splash of water. I was about to put it in the rice cooker and it fell.
Second day again I was thinking about the future and the past, how am I going to do everything, will I make it. And a camera hit my head. I could have gotten a concussion, but by the grace of God it was nothing severe.
God is trying to tell me something. WHY AM I WORRYING IF I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHETHER I WILL BE ALIVE OR NOT. THAT IS EVEN UNCERTAIN, SO WHY AM I ASKING FOR CERTAINTY. NOTHING IN THIS LIFE IS CERTAIN AND IT DEFINITELY DOESN’T GO THE WAY I PLAN IT.
I trust you God, whatever you have in store for me I accept. You know best, you see everything, the unknown. Guide me and I walk your path.