We do get what we ask for, but it takes time

It’s Friday 16th of December, 2016. I found sparkling chemistry with an actor for the first time. Chemistry that comes on screen. On and off. For two months, I have been looking for an actor to play an important role in our short film. I couldn’t find the right actor. A lot of actors rejected the script, because of the ‘simplicity’, a lot of couldn’t, said yes and then couldn’t commit. I mean I was losing hope, to the point of scratching that role of the script and just do without that actor, just only the lead character.

I went hiking, asked God what I should do and I got the answer: ‘Find him’. I always trust and listened to that voice, this time however I thought it was utter nonsense. I had for quite some time a bad experience with casting a male actor, why would I go through that pain. There were no gentlemen out there, only in Europe. I was trying to cast a European actor, but they were no where to find or didn’t want to participate.

I felt hopeless. We got all the equipment, financial means, camera etc. But we didn’t have an actor? Couldn’t find him? Jesus.

After a while I did try again and realized that I couldn’t just ‘cast’ the actor based on pictures and reel. I have to have a screen test, to see if I have chemistry with the actor. It’s just a nature thing, some people you click with, some people I don’t. Just being practical. So I hold the screen test and e-mailed whoever could be fit for the role and might be interested.

Finally, at last, we found one. It was on point chemistry. I wanted a Russian actor and I got one, I didn’t even realize it. 🙂

We do get what we ask for, but in this life there are hurdles. I don’t know why I chose to come on earth and live this life, often I see more hurdles. Where is the joy? Feelings ugh.


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