How cooking is making me feel alive instantly

Good Evening!

2.5 years ago, I would never be able to say this. I hated cooking, I considered it as wasting my time. Until my sister gave up cooking, since she simply didn’t know what to cook anymore besides making pasta and uhh yep just that. Because the minute she knew about processed food, we cut back to sobriety regarding food. But it tasted horrible and the supermarket wasn’t really organic back than. We also didn’t go to farmers market at the time. Just Ralphs.

Now 2.5 years later, I’m in charge and cooking creatively. Making fresh food, everything organic, nothing processed. I make my own hummus, cook my chickpeas. Yes, I soak it for 8 hours overnight. It’s normal, my mom used to do that, but she’s in Amsterdam.

Anyway what I thought was a curse turned out to be the biggest blessing. I LOVE cooking. It’s right now the only thing that gives clarity to my mind. Because I go on the internet and boom, cannot focus, too much content out there, it’s absolutely ridiculous. I turned out my phone. I have a goal and need to commit to it. Like I said, I want to create my own full dimensional life.

In Amsterdam I had a huge kitchen and I got that right now as well. In my previous apartment I didn’t have a big kitchen like this. I APPRECIATE IT SO MUCH RIGHT NOW. I appreciate the fact that I am able to cook. That I can buy organic food at farmers market. I’m grateful to all the farmers at farmers market for providing this, so important!!

Cooking truly gives me a piece of mind. It was utter ignorance talking, when I said I didn’t like cooking. Yes at the time I found it a waste of time and was looking elsewhere to buy food, dine in, just not to cook. It was horrible, the dishes were not exactly appealing and I went to the best restaurant such as in four seasons hotel, beverly hills. They were not delicious. I had brunch, christmas dinner, all looking for culinary food, but nope, that was far from it. I come from Amsterdam where I dined culinary food, and the food there is excellent, perfection at every detail, it was heaven. But now I am so happy to say that I make my own culinary food.

Right now I cooked beet, with rice. And put 1 fresh blood orange at the end, for freshness. I also made chickpeas salad with apple. Plus I made grapefruit, blood orange and avocado salad. I didn’t have spinach anymore 🙂

Delicious, something you would see in the European cuisine, bringing it back here. Finally, at last, I’m able to appreciate my life, the life that I always had. Having it, losing it and then regaining it again. YES!

I want to create my own full dimensional life

Good Evening delicious macaroons,

I truly want to create my own life. Which I am, but even more so. Complete focus on my life only. I have been battling with losing focus for a long time, ever since I am here. Now I must say, that in Europe whole focus was on myself, because 5 years ago, social media was almost non existent in my city at least I wasn’t on it, it wasn’t so huge compared to now.

I travel, I have a family, parents and sister. I live with my sister. I came from Amsterdam, where we had family dinner frequently.

I have to live life. I can’t live like this. I need to go out. Walk, do something. So, I have to wake up early tomorrow, I want to wake up early and hike. I need to get my self back.

I am going to cook and make myself more valuable. But this is absolutely insane. I want to sport more. It’s crucial. I feel horrible right now, I feel like I’m dumbing down. I’m not stupid, but watching irrelevant things, doesn’t increase my vocabulary. I Holland my English vocabulary was rich. This is insane.

I’m done, I want myself back and whatever happens, not matter how much success or great someone else’s life is, mine is great too for me. I love my life and I’m going to work on myself.

Live life, enjoy. I have an easy life and I’m going to accept it.

That’s it. Embracing who I am.

My fresh organic grapefruit-spinach-avocado salad

Hi my delicious fruits,

After eating lentils and rice for a long time, I really needed to refresh things in the kitchen.  I didn’t want to just eat the spinach raw or cook it. I was fed up. I was eating spinach and rice the whole time in my previous apartment. I wanted something fresh. The only thing I had in the fridge was grapefruit, avocado and spinach. So I thought, I can make a salad. I did some research on the internet and I got inspired.

It’s super delicious and easy to make. All ingredients are organic and I bought it at my local farmers market on Hollywood/Ivar. Mmm.

Here’s the recipe:

Put in a bowl:

1 ripe avocado (sliced in blocks)

1 grapefruit (thinly sliced triangles)

1 cup of raw spinach leaves

1 blood orange (optional – it’s now in season so I put it in as well, it gives the salad a sweet pop)

For vinaigrette/dressing (adjust to taste):

1 table spoon/ 50ml Olive Oil

Juice of half a grapefruit

1 teaspoon of organic honey

pinch of salt

Quick, easy and super delicious. Enjoy! 🙂

Love doing the laundry now, represents home and disconnecting from internet

Hi sweetie pies,

I realized that I needed some time off from internet, Instagram and what’s app. I mean I was just checking it, on a constant basis, too much. I wanted my life back, so I didn’t check my phone the whole weekend.

What a peace. I’m happy doing normal things in the house. I embrace it. cooking and doing the laundry. At this apartment, doing the laundry is fun. It’s huge and relaxing.

Finally a spacious laundry room, going out side, close to the pool, love it. It smells nice. I love doing these things. this is life, this is home.

It’s my life and I have to make the most of it.

My aim is to put all focus at all times on myself. 100% focus. Focus on my health, wellbeing and happiness. And what I can do to contribute.

Living life, like I used to, without the hysteria of internet. I realize that there is a lot of time.

Having dinner with my sister at home, with candles, without tv. I can’t eat anymore with a tv.

Excited about my future, step by step.

Much love

Beautiful blue sky, just lying down and finding solace

Beautiful sky, crystal blue with little bit clouds. And airplanes, beautiful. As I was lying on a chair next to the pool, I was enjoying the atmosphere. Really happy and relaxed, living the balanced life. Chilling on Sunday, just lying there. This is life.

Swimming, what a life.
My work ethic comes from relaxing and not talk about it. I want to keep the balance. I love it.
Just watching planes go by.
Amazing view, looking at the palmtrees and the blue sky. ❤
This is life❤
I love the sound of airplanes, when I’m lying down outside. I love planes. I’ve been grown up with that. I love traveling. Traveling gives me joy, it keeps me going. It gives me energy and balance. This is what life is all about.
What a beautiful life. I must say that I can see the beauty of Los Angeles. The mountains, the flowers, the palmtrees, the weather, the opportunities and now they are working on local organic food, wow. Whatever people say, I see it, I see the beauty.
I’m in love with LA from the moment I stepped my feet on this ground, I didn’t know it yet, but now it’s certified. I’m in love with you LA, now and forever.

Rethink. Renew. Refresh

Happy Friday my delicious strawberries,

I’m writing this post, as I’m sitting in nature with my desk on the balcony of my apartment. Fresh air, lovely weather, pool and palm trees as a view.

I’m working on my next project. Also doing some paperwork, but all in the comfort of nature and beautiful atmosphere. Wow, what a journey and the best has yet to come.

New energy has come into my life, my soul feels refreshed. I look up and see the palm trees and the blue sky. It was always there, but I couldn’t see it. All the negativity is gone and embracing the positivity in my life.

Surrounding myself with people who give, who love, who are kind.

A new chapter has begun.

Money is a tool not a destination

Good Evening chocolates,

Going from a big luxurious house in Europe, to a luxurious apartment in LA, to a vintage apartment, to again a luxurious apartment has taught me a few things 😉

I was willing to start from scratch. I left my growing business to go and pursue my dream. I have been rejected many times, but back in 2011 an opportunity came again to try it, after that I have seen success. Also some setback, but that was actually 3 years later in my favor.

It’s beyond money. I love luxury and to get that I need money, but that is not a destination, it’s a tool. Everything makes me feel alive when I’m in harmony. That is the essence of life. Now I can fully enjoy. Truly.

Live life to the fullest. Oh and I just saw the movie seabiscuit, loved it 🙂

Escaping life’s responsibilities. Anxious. Breath and let it go.


It’s Sunday 12th of March. I had a small Spring break, but truly I need more. But I think I am escaping. Escaping life’s ‘responsibilities’. It is scary. I am scared. But honestly I always was very anxious. Will I get my degree, will I have a nice future? I don’t have a plan, how will my life turn out…All those questions were on my mind and it turned out fine.

I know, but I can’t get rid of this anxiety, I have to breath. Closing my eyes, inhaling, exhaling. I let go.

It’s okay. Yes, I would love to talk to people, chat for a moment. But it’s okay. I’m going to lie down. Oeff, closing my eyes, inhaling, exhaling. It’s going to be fine, it’s okay. let it go.

I had an awesome day. It truly was awesome, cut my hair, went to farmer’s market. It was wonderful. Thank you God. It’s going well. Good or bad, this is earth, this anxiety is there. Whatever. I don’t want to feed it. It’s okay. RELAX 🙂

I embrace the luxurious life

I am so grateful for those who told me that what I want is too ambitious. I was always interested in other people’s life. I wanted to live a ‘normal’ life. Or someone else’s life. So how can I blame others to give me an insecure feeling about my life, about myself. If I am weak myself, I’m prone to those things, I started to believe them. But really because I was doubting myself. They pushed me into the darkness and from there I saw the light.

Whoever says to me now, that I just want a ‘simple’ life, don’t need luxury, is lying from head to toe. I know for a fact that they actually wanted my life. I couldn’t see it. I honestly believe having a ‘simple’ life, for me means going after my dreams and yes living a luxurious life. That feels nice. I have experienced that so called ‘simple’ life, small apartment, small income. I learned the values of life, from that experience,but I also can say that I truly appreciate the luxury. There is no right or wrong, both are fine in their own way, it’s just I feel more comfortable with this lifestyle.

From this painful experience, I gained the most and I can now say with full certainty that I truly embrace this luxurious life. Now of course no one can say anything to me, because it doesn’t get to me anymore. I’ve grown and learned the hard way.

I thank that Angel for guiding me and teaching me this valuable lesson, that my life is truly the best for my soul. Every card that God has given me, suits best with my soul and I have finally accepted that. It took me three years and I needed some pain in order to get to this realization.

Now I embrace who I am and I am not shying away from it. I love to work for what I want and I am in harmony with myself.

I love to dress nicely, going to fancy places. Initially I could not enjoy it, but that’s all in the past now. I’ve learned my lesson. I put humanity first, that was also a major aspect in my life that I still have to keep in mind.

Love first, the rest flows out of it’s own. It’s not that I ‘work’ for luxury, this is just part of my lifestyle, it’s who I am, I feel comfortable in this environment, I grew up with it. But the most important thing is, that I am enjoying this journey with my sister. I learned that in the other apartment, it was also nice there, beautiful and vintage. It is there, where I learned to be a good human being. And this is a huge gift of course.

A beautiful gift from God, doing my best, going with the flow and enjoying the cards that has been given to me 🙂