Role model

Hi Sweethearts,

In the morning I went to church and it was very nice and fulfilling. I wore a nice skirt with a red blouse. I did my best regarding looking great today. It felt nice 🙂 It’s nice to dress up just for myself.

A child in the store stopped and kept looking at me. With a beautiful smile, she looked at me as if I was her role model. That was very nice and I appreciate it. I only got that look from a child 5 years ago and in my early years when I was 10 and  younger.

It’s a good sign. I am getting closer to myself. It was and is a beautiful experience to be a role model. I might not feel it, but as an artist it’s not for me to feel, as an artist I have to leave the feeling to the audience.

I might feel ‘alone’ since I don’t have a partner, the kind of partner to give physical affection. But I do have a loving family, sister and friends at the church. But when they all are doing something, that’s where I have to entertain myself. I just have to accept that and stay out of trouble 🙂 it’s a calm christmas, but nice and cozy with myself and God.

As long as I keep working at myself, it’s nice to lift people up with my energy, unconsciously or consciously. Because there is someone looking at me, children and God. He is the judge. He knows what’s best for me. I have to trust.

I trust you, God.

Merry Christmas and at 8pm, I’ll be watching into the woods at El Capitan! Excited! We’ll see how it goes 😉

Lots of love